tears for fears

First tears with the puppy home.

Funny how everything mimics raising my kids. I am sure you all know how puppies and babies are so similar, But more like a young toddler at this point. I remember every little thing my kids did would throw me into the future 20 years. Like if they turned off the tv or bit the neighbors kid or threw their food on the floor...I would think "Oh, I have to show them right now or my child will grow up to be horrible! And you might know what happened next...did "I show them?" Well I think we are all still fighting battle of "showing our kids who is the boss"..hahaha

But what I do know is many times I make decisions out of fear of a future I predict. A, .."If I let them throw their food on the floor then they will think that is ok and will keep doing it...and become a horrible person." Will they really become a horrible person? In my mind if I don't fix this, they will. As you can imagine this has made me become very urgent in all matters, for fear of what that disobedience will hold for the future(not a fun way to live, I will tell you, especially when it drives everyone else around you batty)
Tears came when I had taken the dog to the bathroom, fed her a little but not having great success with that, letting her run around the yard a bit to check things out..now what? I put her back in her crate and she feel asleep. Time to wake the kids...they need to get ready for sports camp, eat some breakfast and oh yea, I need to do the same! But the puppy hears and begins to cry, much to the kids delight. So, I take her out and head to the potty spot outside(kids following like ducks) Then ,I let her run around the back a while, but with the leash on ,because she is a bit excited about the kids. She is jumping up, biting(nipping) at their pants, hands ,socks anything she can tug. Ok..I am not ok with this, so inside we go..we are going to be late! I put her back in her crate. Call Trent and begin to cry...like a momma with a baby that has colic and you don't know what to do. lol
"What do I do with the dog?" "how do I stop her from this biting?" "she wants to chew the rug and anything else she can get" "The kids are making her hyper, the kids want to play with her but I don't know if I should let them?" " omgosh, because I don't know what to do, this dog is going to turn into a horrible dog!" "Because this dog(kid-kids) doesn't do what I tell her she is going to turn into a horrible dog(kid-kids)."
The truth is that anything less than a good(obedient) dog is unacceptable(unacceptable, really?) Do my kids feel unacceptable?humm . How do you show love and acceptance when you feel in your heart disobedience is unacceptable? And where does all this "fear" come from? Is it possible that if those whom we have influence on fail, then we feel like failures too and the world will see us as failures??
Deep breath! today's (and tomorrows)failures do not determine a lesser future but it may determine a more humble, forgiving, accepting, loving person.